Writer's...Block?
Do I believe in it after all? Plus Sherlock Holmes, Jonny Lee Miller, an unwritten paper, and a new poem project
Welcome to Yard Dragon! I’m Lex Orgera, and I write about nature + culture through the lens of gardening, herbalism, literature, art, poetry, and more.
Writer’s...Block?
It’s been a few weeks since my last newsletter because I took some time off to write my 60-page paper for herbal school.
Guess what I did not do?
Yeah, you got it. I did not write that paper. I did do a lot of fun research, though to what end I’m unsure. Herein lies my issue: I don’t know what I’m writing. It’s not an academic paper; I want it to be lyric essays around the topic I’m researching, but I cannot for the life of me make that happen.
I know I don’t just have one book of essays in me, but it feels like the trauma of writing that book (and, of course, the experience that created the book) might be stopping me up?
What is writer’s block if not subconscious discouragement from your deepest fears?
I’ll tell you a secret: I never actually believed in writer’s block until now. I silently scoffed at people for using it as an excuse. I always thought: just write every day, and you’ll be fine.
Sherlock Holmes & the Case of the Missing Oomph
Enter Sherlock Holmes. Specifically Jonny Lee Miller’s version of Sherlock in Elementary. I’m enamored with Miller’s portrayal of Holmes, the fastidiousness of personal appearance coupled with his brilliant mind, his complete reliance on his partnership with Watson (Lucy Liu), his inability to express his emotions but utter ease with which he can express truths of, say, a case or how he knows when someone is lying to him. The awkward body movements and facial expressions.
I can’t really say enough about the importance of Watson, but I’ll just say for now that I wasn’t crazy about Liu in this role at first: the acting was wooden and stoic in a way that I didn’t like, but I think Liu has grown into the character and I’ve grown to really like her as Sherlocks confidant, calming influence, partner in crime(solving), roomie, and dearest friend. She’s also fairly interesting and complex in her own right.
Like all Holmeses before him, this Holmes has a knack for finding the needle in the haystack. Knack is the wrong word. It’s a form of genius. A way of seeing the world that lives between the lines, hidden in the airwaves.
Then there is the dark side of his addictions. The side that likes unattached sex. The traumatized bits.
So, last Friday in the ‘Ol Bard poetry club, I was not surprised that my poem was called “Dear Watson.” What I was surprised about was how much I liked it. I really liked this poem and the voice I was assuming, which felt a helluva lot like Miller’s Sherlock, or the things he would say if he could express his deepest longings and beliefs. But it also felt like me being a character I relate to.
Back to the Block
So...turns out that maybe I don’t have writer’s block when it comes to poetry (though I definitely have before. Try not publishing a book for ten years despite having four or five manuscripts always making the rounds)...but you could say that I’ve recently had writer’s boredom (“Life, friends, is boring. We must not say so.”) This new voice-of-Sherlock series——yep, it’s become a series now——is re-stoking my fire.
I’ll just say this: I believe in it now, the ol’ block. But I don’t think it’s something that comes from on high or without precedent. Or like Rick sometimes says, “The muse just hates me.”
Nope, for me it’s plain old fear and self-doubt. It’s that inner naysayer who’s knocking on my shoulder, whispering in my ear, “Do you actually think you can do this?”
You know what? The answer is always yes——intellectually. Now to get my guts and heart to believe it too...
Plant Updates
I’ve got a good plant post growing for this upcoming week.
The past few weeks, we’ve started making some progress on the front beds. If you’ll remember, we’d been “mowscaping” all summer. Well, we got some wood chips, mulch, and soil delivered, collected a bunch of cardboard boxes, mowed and tilled one of the beds, and voila: a new sheet-mulched, lop-sided bed for planting next spring.
One of the wickedest tasks in this process: uprooting the dreaded Bermuda grass. Turns out, it’s not so dreaded in some cultures...
Leaving you with a tiny fall harvest, calendula and saffron. WHY ARE MY SAFFRON CROCUSES BLOOMING SO EARLY!!!!!
xo,
Lex
William Stafford claims he wrote a poem everyday and was asked what he does if he has writer''s block. He replied, I lower simply my standards.